Teachers

I’ve recently returned from a week long visit with one of my most powerful spiritual teachers: Los Angeles. I grew up in the San Fernando Valley, and my parents still live there, as does my brother. So, I often make the journey back to visit them; the funny part is that when I return I often realize how much the visit was about my getting new insights, understandings, and an excellent time for practice. For what better way to practice then when our buttons are getting pushed, right?

I always have problems going back to L.A. The desert environment, the pollution, the traffic, the tinted car windows so you can’t see fellow drivers, the underlying vibration of fear that prevents strangers from even acknowledging each other if you pass each other walking in the park, the lack of trees (translation: lack of oxygen output in a city that has a high C02 input) …. all of these things add up to be an exhausting energetic experience. It strips me of all my defenses. It batters every level of my being — physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual. During a S.O.S. phone call to a fellow spiritual traveller years ago, he pointed out to me that L.A. was obviously a great teacher for me. “Yeah, yeah, right …” was about all I could muster then … who wanted to hear that when I was drowning in the desert? But as the years have passed, and I continue to return year after year, I am starting to see the power that this “teacher” has in my life.

And it makes me understand how so many different teachers appear in our lives that we may not take full notice of, and therefore deny ourselves the chance to learn some great lessons. Every word, thought and deed can be a teaching; and any activity we engage in, can be a teacher. IF we are present enough, mindful enough, of our experience in the midst of it to notice what’s happening to/for us as it occurs. When we are, and we take some time to step back from being embroiled in the situation, we can see the energies at work and can further our understanding of why we behave the way we do. AND, if we understand that “why”, we can make a conscious choice in how we act/react. We can choose an action/reaction that will either contribute to the chaos, or to the peace within ourselves or others.

Mindfulness

I believe that meditation and mindfulness practice is the most powerful endeavor we can devote ourselves to, because through this practice we become aware of who and what we are; we discover how our brains work; and we discover that we can choose how we behave and react. Through this practice, we come to understand our thoughts ~ what they are, where they come from, where they go; and we come to see that we are not our thoughts, we are not our emotions, we are not our bodies. Meditation and mindfulness practice teaches us how to live more fully in the present moment; which, as I learned today, is where the right hemisphere of our brain lives. This practice helps us touch that inner peace within us; it helps us develop patience and tolerance (with ourselves and others); it build compassion within us. And as we cultivate those qualities, we become more peaceful beings. As we each become more peaceful within, so our world does without.

Just today, a friend passed on a link (see below) to an amazing video. Jill Taylor is a brain scientist who had a stroke; and her experience of the stroke is like no other you’ll ever hear told. In this video she explains how the right cortex of our brain processes all the energetic input from our sensory perceptions; and how our right hemisphere experience of life is that of the oneness of all; complete non-separation; the very present moment. No YOU, no I … just all; and a deep inner peace. She also explains how the left cortex of our brain processes all the details; how it manages all the thoughts, reminds us to get bananas at the store on our way home; remembers the past, plans for the future; defines us as an individual living in time and space.

What is amazing is to hear how this experience of hers showed her the truth of existence; and motivated her to recover so she could share this experience to encourage people to choose to exist in the world of the right hemisphere … as she puts it “I believe that the more time we spend choosing to run the deep, inner peace circuitry of our right hemispheres, the more peace we will project into the world, and the more peaceful our planet will be.”

The video is 18 minutes; get yourself a cup of tea and allow yourself these 18 minutes. It’s not only educational, but incredibly moving, and dare I say … enlightening. You’ll be inspired to develop a relationship with your right hemisphere

Jill Taylor video

Go Ahead: Get Mad!

Recently I have been working with the experience of the emotional body; you know, that part of you that feels everything that the mental part of you can so easily rationalize away. I discovered that I had become very good at understanding why I feel something, and therefore not acknowledging the emotional body’s “right” to express itself. Boy, is that a mistake! That emotional body will find a way to have it’s say, let me tell you!

One of the most challenging emotions for me to work with is anger. I logically (and spiritually) know, that acting out in anger is not beneficial for me or anyone else who is involved in whatever situation is causing the anger to arise. So when my emotional body gets triggered by something and I feel the response of anger, I tend to “get logical” about the situation, and I try to skip doing the emotional part. If another person is involved, I go back to them after I have had a chance to come to clarity about what the anger is about, so that we can work through the issue together. This has been quite productive, generally; but what I realized I’ve skipped is the acknowledgment of my emotional body. In fact, I’ve actually denied that part of me the “right” to be part of me. Not really a healthy thing in the long run , as my lower back can attest to.

Recently I have begun working with it differently with anger, and all my emotions. Now, instead of getting logical, I get emotional! I let the anger come up, if I need to cry, I cry; if I need to sit in the anger for awhile, then I let myself. I recognize my emotional body, and give it the time it needs to be that way (sort of like allowing a 2 year old to throw the tantrum, knowing that eventually it’ll calm down, and will let go of whatever it was that caused the upheaval to begin with). What I don’t do is release that emotion on the people around me. I just let it be there, and in the quiet times between being interactive with others, I let myself go into it and explore it.

I was reading the March issue of Body & Soul Magazine today, and I found the following which I thought was very useful for guide for “How To Get Mad”:

“Research shows that both ends of the anger continuum — unchecked ire and self-silencing — can damage your health, contributing to a range of health conditions. Strike a more balanced approach with these tips:

“Take a Step Back: When people or situations anger you, take note of how you react. Do you tend to empathize? Feel depressed or anxious? Start negative self-talk? Raise your awareness before you rush to “make it right” or keep the peace.

“Know When to Walk Away: If you’re in conflict with someone who’s hostile, or if you’re feeling explosive and hostile, leave the interchange immediately. Nothing productive occurs in these exchanges, and they can harm your health.

“Feel What You Feel: When you have time and space, explore the full range of your emotions. If you feel empathy for a person you’re in conflict with, express that. But also express the part of you that feels angry. If you don’t think you feel anger, practice stepping into that feeling, even if it feels like pretending. (If you have experienced a particular emotion for years, it may feel foreign at first.) Writing in a journal is a great way to off-load primal emotions.

“Harness Your Anger: Use the anger to plan your next steps, then set your plan a side and revisit it when you are not angry. You may find that the steps you ultimately take differ from the ones you planned while you were mad; and this is usually for the best. Using anger consciously, rather than as raw fuel (or not at all) generally yields the best results.

“Don’t Explode, but DO Express: If you’re in a significant relationship with a person who angered you, avoid self-silencing. If you have difficulty summoning the courage to speak your mind, start by taking a few deep breaths and meditating or saying a prayer. Start the conversation by letting the person know you care about him or her, and that you need to express some feelings. That will help open the door to honest communication.”

Key to this process, I believe, is that ability to take a “pause” when the anger arises … long enough for us to realize that we’re angry, that something has triggered something within us that needs to be addressed. I find that anger in particular is a signal to me that there is some part of me that feels defensive, attacked, less than, or unworthy, and that’s always a clue for another piece that I need to work with for my own spiritual, emotional, psychological growth. When we use anger (or any other strong negative emotion) as a self-awareness tool, we find that these emotions can lead us to our greatest insights.

So go ahead and get mad; just be conscious and constructive with it!

Our World

Take 5 minutes and watch this; it’ll touch your heart.

Obama

Learning to Ask “Why?”

Every week, the most enlightened being in my everyday life teaches me something new about the experience of being human. This week the lesson was around asking “why” and learning how to ask the question without having some pre-determined judgement about the thing I’m asking “why” about.

My little friend has reached that point of asking “why” about everything; and whenever you answer the question, the next “why” question is about the answer. It’s a delightful game, and brings not only the questioner to new insights, but the person answering the question into clarity about why things are the way they are.

What I noticed was the complete openness and curiosity with which the question is asked, and the same about the answer provided. There’s a pondering; a considering; a trying to make sense and categorize that new information. And there is a complete lack of opinion and total lack of judgment about the entire scenario. It’s all just information, coming and going.

So, after this interaction, I was at coffee with a friend, and the topic of crucifixion arose, given it was Good Friday. In particular, the story I had heard about devout Roman Catholics in the Phillipines who recreate the crucifixion in it’s entirety, including being nailed to a cross. I listened to myself say, “Why? Why on earth would anybody do that?” And what I heard was the subtext of my question: “Those people are nuts!” I wasn’t really asking “Why”, in the way my little friend so open-heartedly wants to know. I was actually making a highly judgmental statement about a ritual, a religion, and a faith that I know absolutely nothing about.

As I pondered this the next couple of days, I began to see how often I do that. Instead of just really resting in that curious place … (I mean, truly … wouldn’t it be interesting and enlightening to hear one of those individuals answer that question? “Why do you put your mind, body, heart and soul through such torture?” As I ask it in that openness even now as I write, I can hear an answer that makes complete sense! Granted, I personally wouldn’t do that, but for some, it is a path towards oneness and the creating of compassion within one’s heart) … I preload the question with a judgment.

So I am now practicing asking “why” with the same child-like open-heartedness that my little friend does. I’m curious to hear what new insights come as a result. Thank you, Connor!